Monthend Randomness: Feeling Blue

I’ve always known time passes by a little quicker in the beginning of the year. There are so many things to do, and many of us are still pumped and excited to meet our new year resolutions. For me, it’s a little different this year. Family members seem to be unwell a lot lately and my grandma has been in and out of the hospital. Maybe she misses my granddad too much. I can see how hard it is to lose someone you’ve been with for more than 60 years. When the heart is involved, when there are emotions involved, everything changes. People die every day. Why would some matter more than others? I’d die one day. Why would I matter more to some and not others? It’s because I’ve only touched the hearts of some and not all. So, our heart, is a fragile thing. Fragile but powerful.

Where am I going with this? I don’t know. I’ve seen some people shine so brightly during the darkest times, and yet, some people shine because they bring darkness to the world. We’re a confused bunch, yes we are. Just like how I am right now. So if we hang on tight to our true self, will there be less confusion? I know I can only try. There are so many shades of grey. If only things are as clear as black and white.

On another note, what I know for sure is, I’ve used up these skincare products. I love every one of them (well, except for the Biotherm moisturizer) and I’m sad to throw them in the bin. The Estee Lauder ANR serum has become a little too pricey, so I’m looking for alternatives. Luna is great, and I will repurchase.

 

 

 

 

I have used up and threw out some makeup too, but I post updates on Instagram instead. I think I’m feeling a little blue this Tuesday. I feel bloated, snacking on roasted peanuts (which will just make me bloat more!) and I think the bleeding fest will start soon. That’ll explain my mood too. I should hit the gym later but I feel so lazy. Hope you’re more bubbly than I am!

 

 

xoxo Lily

 

 

 

20 Things That Make Me Happy

It’s been a little difficult to get on a regular blogging schedule. I’ve been so busy! I can set aside one night to write a few posts to be scheduled throughout the next 2 weeks, but after that night, I’d be offline for 3 weeks. Hahaha! I still do blogging things offline like taking photos and testing stuff, writing down notes, but I just couldn’t find the time to sit down to edit photos and write a proper post. You guys will think I’ve only been away for a week or so, since you’ve been getting the pre-written posts fed to your inbox but for me, I feel like it’s been ages since I wrote! So I think I’ll do something light and fluffy. This is inspired by Tracy’s blogpost here. She did 50 things, but I think I’ll scale it down to 20. Here they are, in no particular order.

 

 

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1. My Children’s Laughter

Nothing else make my heart swell so much. No matter how shitty I’d feel, their hearty laughter makes me burst with happiness! I especially love a baby’s laugh. This Instagram video was taken more than 3 months ago, but Ashton still laughs like that. LOVE!

 

2. A Warm Hug

An enveloping hug that’s strong and protective. A bear hug from the husband makes all my worries and stress go away.

 

3. My Mom’s Cooking

Nothing compares to mom’s home cooked meal. It can be a very simple one, but it warms my tummy and makes me go Aaaahhhh…

 

4. Good Friends

I’m not one to have many circles of friends, but the little one that I have is a circle of very dear friends I can depend on.

 

forever friends

 

5. Hot Noodles with Soup

I have a crazy affection for soup noodles. Preferably spicy ones. I really like our local curry vermicelli and Korean ramyeon. I like Hokkaido ramen, Kyushu ramen… yumm!!

 

6. Sushi

All sorts. Enough said. With lots of pickled ginger.

 

7. Beautiful Makeup

There’s a reason I’m still blogging. All the pretties still get me, even though there are times I don’t give a hoot.

 

8. Hitting Pan

Yes, while I appreciate beautiful untouched makeup, I feel it’s a waste not using them. Looking at well used makeup makes me happy!

 

to empty

 

9. Chloe’s Quiet Thoughtfulness

Chloe, my 9-year-old now, remains my first love (husband aside). She’s my first baby, and she’s grown so much. She’s still little, at only 9 years old, but she’s mature beyond her age. She has much consideration for others and she makes me proud.

 

10. Ashlyn’s Ridiculous Stories

She can’t be more different than Chloe. She’s loud, outgoing, hyperactive and so imaginative. She sometimes doesn’t make sense, but her stories are so silly and funny at the same time. She’s fearless and has no qualms of asking an adult if she brushed her teeth because her teeth looked yellow and she had smelly breath. HAHAHAHA!

 

11. Ashton’s Cuteness

I’m totally biased. Everything about him is cute. The way he trots around with his diapers to the way he scrunches his face when it’s smelly. He’s so animated and he copies everything everyone else does. His smile and dimples be the death of everyone including strangers! We often get interrupted at shops and cafes because strangers just want to play with him. Scare the shit out of me though… so many kidnapping cases in broad daylight lately, I’d rather be left alone thank you.

 

12. Movies

I’m a movie buff. I enjoy all sorts of movies but don’t watch horror anymore. Children and even the husband get scared. Am I the only one who wonder how they do the scary makeup?

 

13. K dramas

Guilty pleasure. I am not ashamed of ogling at pretty boys 10 years younger. Sssshhh just don’t tell everyone!

 

14. Baking

Baking calms me down. And people enjoying my baked goodies make me happy. Below are my salted Oreo cupcakes. The cupcakes themselves are sweet but the buttercream loaded with Oreo crumbs are salted.

 

Oreo cupcakes

 

15. Quite time

It’s hard to get some quiet time now, so whenever I’m given the opportunity, I appreciate it. I need my time to myself to recuperate, to find my center again. I could be doing nothing, or just having a long bath, or taking time to read (a luxury now) but as long as it’s quiet and I can gather my thoughts, I can find myself again.

 

16. Weekends / Family Time

This is the time everyone in the family is around together. We’d go out for lunch, or we’d go to the mall, or maybe we’d go swimming together, all 5 of us. Love family time.

 

17. Good Skincare

Good skincare is everything. As I get older, I appreciate creamier textures more. My skin is changing, and KNOWING that is winning half the battle. Now for the other half, finding a new routine that works. I am fortunate that I get to experiment with more products, so I know what works and what doesn’t, but it’s also unfortunate if my skin reacts negatively to certain products. Part and parcel of blogging, which is why I only accept skincare from trusted brands now. By that, I mean brands that my skin likes.

 

18. Cartoons

I watch a lot of cartoons. I’d go to the movies when there’s a new cartoon out. At the moment, the fever is Pocoyo. The kids love it, and I enjoy it too. It’s cuteness overload, and funny too.

 

pocoyo

 

19. Chocolate

I don’t eat sweets much. I don’t like hard candy. I hardly eat ice cream. I only have a bite or a serving of the things I bake myself. But chocolates, I LOVE!

 

20. Accepting Myself

I’m always hard on myself. I used to think people always talked bad about me behind my back. I am insecure, and I’m still working on my insecurities. My husband says I’m just a drama queen. Maybe so. As I got older, I developed a ‘don’t give a shit’ attitude. As I grew to accept myself, it just doesn’t bother me if there are people who don’t accept me, because there will be those who do. We all have something precious that others crave. Some people might look like they have it all, but every single person has their own worries and insecurities. So for me, I don’t need to do anything but to be the best version of MYSELF. Me. That makes me feel much better about myself, and just so much happier. So if you’re like me, let me sincerely tell you – you are just fine the way you are!

 

I hope you enjoyed this. What are some of the things that make you happy? *cue Pharrell’s Happy* It’s been playing in my head as I wrote this 🙂

 

 

xoxo Lily

 

 

 

Can You Lend Me An Ear?

Or your eyes, since you’ll be reading? I feel like I need to talk / rant / ramble. If you’re up to incoherent thoughts, then sit back and humor me 🙂

 

 

random

 

 

Can I complain about some PR people first? If you blog, you might empathize. If you do not blog, then this might be an eye opener. When I agree to accept a product (review not guaranteed), I have all the creative control – which means, I write the review based on my personal opinions and PRs have no say on what to write. I do not send drafts before I post and I do not work well with deadlines. If you tell me that I need to put up a screenshot of your site’s homepage, I’ll tell you no. If you tell me that I MUST write a blog post AND another short one on your online store, I’ll say no (I’m lazy that way). If you tell me that I MUST tell my readers this and that while I never experienced it myself, I’ll tell you to buzz off. So what happened was, with 2 different companies now, AFTER I agreed to accept the products, they send me an email with a bunch of “REQUIREMENTS”.

Can you even comprehend how I feel? I agreed to accept the products and possibly to review them if they’re good, and after we say OK, you tell me I have to do 10 other things? I never agreed to this. I hope these people didn’t think I was desperate for the products, because dude, I can live without any of them and I still have too big a stash to handle. Not to mention all the work I have to do just for a blog post. And the NERVE of them to ask me to give them my UNEDITED photos. How generous do you think I am? I replied that with a price for them to pay. Basically, if you really like my photo, pay me USD500 PER photo. LOL! It was really a polite “fuck off” but hey, if they agree to pay, then why stop them? I have no ads on my site, I don’t get paid anything, so time to make some $, right?

So anyway, this latest case, I had to reply the email immediately to tell them NOT to send me anything until we agree with ALL the requirements first. And knowing myself, I’ll only agree to terms given by me. If not, they can just shove it. Seriously though, I wonder how many bloggers agree to these ridiculous demands? Are these so called marketing people still so fresh that they do not know how to work with us? Have they been working with a bunch of door mats that they think this is OK?

RANT over.

On a happier note…

In exactly 2 weeks, Ashton turns ONE! I am absolutely obsessed with this little man. I am also shamelessly biased – he’s just so cute even when he’s making that face when he poops, or when he pretends to cry, or when he stands with his hands up wanting me to carry him. This is him trying to look cute.

 

 

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It’s been tiring, he’s very demanding, and I’m actually exhausted. But you know what? 1 year literally flew past, and I know I’ll be getting more sleep soon. In the meantime, I’ll just enjoy his chubbiness and helplessness because when he starts to exert more of his independence, my little man won’t be so little anymore. Just like the girls. They are now so big, I can have a proper discussion with them! This mom is beaming with pride, and I couldn’t be more blessed, even when the girls do drive me crazy.

That’s my random blahs of the day. It’s a nice break from makeup and skincare 🙂 While life is not the perfect package, it’s THE perfect package of good and bad, ups and downs, just for me and for that, I am thankful.

What are you thankful for?

 

xoxo Lily

 

 

37 Rounds

Happy birthday to me! I am 37 years old today. Wow. If I live until 74, I’m smack at the midpoint of my life at the moment. Thinking back, it’s also funny how priorities changed. My 20-year-old self had NO idea. LOL! If you noticed, my blog posts have been sporadic and I have a feeling it’ll be this way for a while. I considered taking a proper break, and that time will probably come too. I have many posts sitting in my draft, and I need to get them out before I could “rest in peace”. Hahaha! I have many things to show you, but I’ve been feeling uninspired, that’s all.

 

 

happy birthday

 

 

So, this post is to let you know that I’m taking things slow (because I’ve been very tired taking care of Ashton) and that I’ll be posting when time allows it. I will take a breather and I’ll be back sooner than you think! Oh, and I planned a giveaway, have the goodies stored some place safe… and I will get my act together hopefully soon.

 

Until then, take care and enjoy my posts whenever they pop up!

 

 

xoxo Lily

 

 

 

Updates and Random Thoughts

It’s been a while since I dumped my random thoughts on the blog. My daily life is quite a routine, where I’d take care of the little baby, and chauffeur the girls to and from school / classes. Then, at least 5 days a week, I’d try to get my workout in, whenever I have the time. I’m lucky to have some help, so it hasn’t been very stressful. However, that’s about it. I haven’t really been thinking much at all, and it makes me feel like a robot.

 

random

 

I was watching some random YouTube videos after the kids went to sleep, and someone talked about getting rid of old makeup due to eye infection. Dude, I’ve had eye infection for a whole friggin month. It started with a harmless stye on my lower right lid, which then turned into a huge chazalion on the upper lid. I thought it was over and done with until my left eye decided to join the party, starting with a stye and THEN a chazalion. W. T. F. I was off eye makeup for the whole month! So, even though the infection was NOT due to makeup (I used all new stuff, mmkay?), I went through my Z-palettes and Unii palettes and got rid of old makeup. A few years back, I depotted some old palettes and singles, so I got rid of the oldest ones. (photo on Instagram here) I was sad, but I haven’t been using them anyway. And then it hit me that I really have too much. Even with my Stash Shopping posts every alternate Sunday, I couldn’t go through all of them.

There’s an old Dior (LE) palette that I depotted, and I love the eye shadows very much. I use them now and then, but there’s also a beautiful shifty purple cream liner that’s old. The texture has always been dry and hard, but it still swatches beautifully. I don’t know if I want to throw it away! But what if I get an eye infection from it? But dude, there’s no way I could find this shade ever again! But when was the last time I used this? The eff… my mind was playing ping pong with itself.

And that is why, my friends, I have been toying with the idea of letting everything go. Stop blogging, stop reading blogs, just stop it already. There are so many new shiny things, new beautiful things, and there will always be the next best thing. It will never stop. If I didn’t keep up, didn’t know any of it, the lust won’t be there. I’ll be able to use the money saved for something that I actually need. I look at the makeup that I have, and I only really need 5% of them, probably less. Then, perhaps, I’d use up something before buying something new. The craving for new things and the addiction of wanting more feels dangerous to me.

I asked myself before – if I stopped blogging, how would my makeup life be? I think I’ll just stick with that few foundations, blushes and basic eye makeup. For skincare, I’ll probably just stick to what works and will MAYBE give something new a try every now and then. It will be boring. Then maybe I’ll pick up another hobby, but the same thing will happen again. Once I like something, I am borderline obsessive. All or nothing – that seems to be both my strength and weakness.

So there really is no cure. SUCCUMB! I’d just have to tell myself that this is more economical than those with luxury bag addiction, or fine jewelry addiction. That could bankrupt a person if not managed properly. I should really be happy right? Through this unhealthy obsession, I met wonderful like-minded people, have silly chats on twitter and laugh at our so called hobby. See? I just talked myself into believing that this is a good thing. I should be perpetually sitting on a rainbow. What problem do I have? None apparently. And all those words… just to come back to square one. I’m a happy camper 🙂

I guess you’re stuck with me for a little longer. Until I run out of excuses.

What about you? Is anything bothering you lately?

 

xoxo Lily

 

 

 

A Little Update Since Ashton

Hello everyone! It feels like I haven’t been writing anything for ages because whatever posts you’ve been reading so far were scheduled way ahead of time. So while you’ve been getting regular updates here, I’ve been slacking off somewhere else. LOL! It is a little weird to be typing away on my laptop at the moment, especially with the addition of the youngest family member. If you’ve been following me on any of the other social media (Twitter, Instagram, Facebook), you’d probably already know what’s been going on, but if you haven’t, a little man popped out of my tummy a few weeks ago.

 

Ashton hand

 

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